I remember my first day of school in America! I was the first one to arrive in my little classroom! The teacher had all kinds of quotes, maps, and pictures on the walls. There was an American flag next to her desk! As I touched it, a chill went through my body! I was an American! Having received my papers of citizenship, I now belonged! I lifted the somewhat used lid of the desk and carefully put all the pencils, crayons, and paper into the cubby holding part. I closed my eyes listening to the noise of children going to their classrooms. My first day of the rest of my dream life—-“hey, Are you Chinese?” With shock I opened my eyes to see before me a boy of very dark skin. “Excuse me,” I asked? “Are you Chinese?” I had never seen a boy of his color and he had never seen an Asian! I was so appalled that my hand and my arm reacted. I punched that boy in the nose! Somehow the years of defending myself on the streets surfaced. I was not Chinese, Korean, or any other Asian! I was American!!!! I was American!!! So, my first day at school, my dad was called and I was reprimanded by the principal! Of course the little boy had no idea the demons that were aroused by such an innocent question!
A new start in a new country did not begin well——- Have you had a bad start to a resolution? A dream- someone or something pops your fantasy? One more stretch of life lays before us! Will we make it? No one hears the rumble of fear and doubt inside us! Another journey, uncertain and a bit afraid of the pain which might lay ahead of us. Pleading inside that the pains of yesteryear’s will not repeat itself! Will we finish our journey well? Can we take any more blows? My dear friends, while we question, our Wonderful Creator Papa is right beside us reminding us who we truly are! He hears our sighs and wipes away every tear that falls. He listens to every doubt which pours out from our unbelief! I have learned that in the midst of my fears, His assurance shouts that I will never walk alone and peace floods my soul. There are times that I do not understand the adversary of my journey, but I know the one who holds my hands! With the firmness of His Word, I walk in confidence. By His Grace, my burden is light! With His promises, my eyes are kept on Him! In His Love, I know His mighty hands will never let go! In His mercy and kindness, He will bring me through! With His Strength, I will finish my journey well! In Him alone, I will triumph!!!! Looking back on that first day, I realize the fear of rejection took-over. Thank you Jesus, you knew me then, and carried me till I learned to lean into you and walk the long arduous road. There have been threatening obstacles, but my legs are strong and my heart is ready for my tomorrows! In this coming New Year, let your resolutions be that-He and He alone will lead you and provide all you need for your 2018 journey!
